Lately, I don’t know what I’ve been seeing more of on my newsfeed — Hiddleswift or Pokemon Go. Now, before you go trying to catch the Charmander chillin’ atop your computer screen, stay and let me finish. Or rather, let Kanye finish.
While Swifties aged 20 and below will fight you on it, we have to consider, how well do we really know Taylor Swift? This question has become especially relevant following Kim K’s release of a video featuring a phone call between Kanye and Taylor, where TSwift seemingly approves of the “Famous” lyrics, discrediting her claim in a GQ interview that she did not provide approval of the song. (Because if anyone has mastered the art of winning from a video recording, it’s Kim Kardashian.) Swift took to Instagram to try to defend herself, but the damage was been done. At the end of the day, is this really just a nice, innocent cat lady who sings about all of her exes?
While at this point in time, we do not know with absolute certainty that T. Swift really did cheat on Calvin, we do know that:
- Her style has changed back to effortless meets homeless (sorry, but have her cats been brushing her hair?)
- She has cheated on us all with the idea that she wants nothing to do with Kanye.
The next time you see a fake bag on canal street you need to judge it on a scale of 1 to Taylor Swift before buying it
— bryanboy (@bryanboy) July 18, 2016
Whether she (or we…) wants to admit it, Kanye is more than a one night stand to Swift. He is more than “that night” at the MTV music awards.
Maybe it’s just me, but I can’t help but picture T. Swift and Kanye as synonymous to Clinton and Monica Lewinsky. Hear me out, or should I say “let’s blow this out candle out together”? (Sry, the jokes will never end.) But really, you can’t say one name without thinking the other. Whenever we see Taylor walk up to get her 500th Grammy/award/certificate for being dumped, we anticipate Kanye walking up. And if he doesn’t, we almost get disappointed. We want more. We want the drama.
Because, for what it’s worth, I do believe Mr. West is both poignant and kind, but there is an anticipation here and we just can’t quite “shake it off,” if you catch my drift. We’re so fascinated, so fascinated, that we can’t stop talking about it.
You may not know this unless you are a Kanye Enthusiast like myself, but when he dropped Yeezy 3 (in case you missed it, he added red to his collection), he also announced plans to unveil a new video game called Only One (after a song written for North from the perspective of Donda West) wherein his mother would travel through the gates of heaven, ask anybody if they care and they say no. Sorry, Donda.
On that very same day, he landed on the moon and launched his new album, Life of Pablo. Obv kidding about the moon, but shit, what else could the guy birth that day? In the event you haven’t yet acquainted yourself with the album, he credits God the way, say, Calvin Harris might credit Rihanna, among his esteemed co-collaborators. We all truly only know and remember one thing from that day and that is Kanye’s song “Famous.” Along with calling his own wife a bitch (a name he claims she is accustomed to), he also states, “I feel like me and Taylor might still have sex.”
Like myself, your first thought might have been “How are Taylor, Kanye and Kim all going to fit in one bed?” But Kanye, always a step ahead of us, answers that question by creating a “Last Supper” of sorts in his latest music video. Specifically, he shows (for six+ minutes, but who’s counting besides me) a bed where right next to him is…his mother-in-law (is Caitlin his mother-in-law?) Anyway, besides that, right right next to him is T. Swift. Yeezus, you done did it again.
For months, Taylor claimed she knew none of this and was just as shocked as we all were. But you can’t make wax figures like that overnight, so who’s really fooling who? And now that we have the video to prove it, we need to ask ourselves, who’s really getting the good publicity out of this? Answer: both of them — KanTay2020, you guys ain’t foolin’ nobody.