“Fifty!” What Reuben Feffer yells counting down to his orgasm in Along Came Polly, probably one of the most absurd endings to a movie sex scene.
However, his full 4 minutes and 10 seconds of triumph was preceded by a series of events that were rather unusual for the main character. Random foods, salsa dancing, disorganization and slight health risks all played a part in the relationship he pursued with Polly. One of the subtle things that stood out to me was the moment in which Reuben and Polly are getting hot and heavy, and Reuben decides to spice things up with a solid smack on her ass, or a spanking if you will. Again, completely out of character for him, which you can tell by his hesitation, but he followed through.
It brings to mind the connection between trying new things in life to push your sexual boundaries in the bedroom. Just as there are gateway drugs, it makes sense that there are gateway events. Like how a thrill seeker may try a roller coaster before jumping out of a plane, one might try chocolate covered crickets before trying anal.
Dont Be a DNB
You and your partner can’t both be “Do Nothing Bitches,” especially with sex. One of you has to be willing to try new things and have the mental persistence to bring your partner around. You don’t have to be a thrill seeker, but a gateway drug is still a drug. The element of surprise helps a lot to prevent you from backing out of the task. Take charge and plan an entire date full of new activities for you and your desired one.
Use the concept of the gateway drug to elicit open mindedness. Take baby steps. Try not to go from everyday missionary to full blown Christian Grey. It’s not as simple as trying a new restaurant, but more like a sensory shock. When you think about food, think about new tastes, and textures, sweet and sour, spicy or mild, ways to sit, how you eat it, the kind of dessert.
Changing how the motor skills operate on an everyday basis, along with playing around with sensory interactions opens your mind to new interactions. So when you go home from your well executed date, introducing a paddle or handcuffs in your sexual endeavors won’t be met with as much resistance and may very well be welcomed.
Get that adrenaline rush
The good ole’ adrenaline rush, pretty useful for getting someone to fall in love with you, but if you’re already on that path, few things will get the heart pounding like getting caught in the act. Here’s the catch: you don’t follow through just yet. Use whatever skill you’ve acquired from the Kamasutra or Cosmo, and get your partner all riled up in a private public place. The thrill of doing something that you shouldn’t will probably enhance the interaction. But hold back and immediately take them home, ride the chemical wave, and again use this window period of passion and openness to introduce your brand new 50 shades chamber.
Without going into too much detail, there are loads of ways to stimulate your sex life. Even if it’s only in 4 minute and 10 second intervals, make it the best 4 minutes and 10 seconds of your life, each time. Explore the boundaries of life as a whole, and your hunger for new things will translate in other areas as well. SEX. I MEAN YOUR SEX LIFE!