This idea that we are all growing and maturing gracefully unscathed throughout our 20s is a joke – especially in a city like New York. We live in this amazing/horrifying place that is essentially a homosexual playground dedicated to catering to its 20something dwellers. Why would anyone want to settle down when there are thousands of potential connections vogueing in every borough?
Cue the modern day A/S/L. Remember hiding behind the family desktop chatting with total strangers in Yahoo, AOL or MSN chatrooms? As a thirteen-year-old flamboyant AF boy, I remember chatting for countless hours online with all of these dreamboats and total babes (which were probably 40-year-old child molesters, but YOLO). Of course it was fun, but looking back, it was most definitely just a way for me to pass slow time in a small town before this QUEEN could move to New York and take on the real deal. We might tell ourselves that we are far past that stage in our lives, but we need to think again. We may have traded in the family desktop for an iPhone 6 and a lunchbox for an AMEX, but deep down, we still play these same exact games.
Many of us sit at our desks swiping right and left until we find that Prince Charming of the afternoon, but how concrete are these relationships that we put so much false hope in to? In a city that is so connected and so up-to-date, why is it that we can’t find a connection that lasts more than a few dates or even a few hours?
It is my personal belief that the gay community still plays these childhood games—except with hard alcohol and EDM. I know our childhood was great. Britney was putting out fresh auto-tuned hits every six months, the Spice Girls had their reunion tour, and Lizzie McGuire was the shit – but it’s time for all of us to make a change.
We are hiding behind all of these apps that reinforce the belief that we should look like Abercrombie & Fitch models (circa 2000 obvi, not their current day bullshit excuses), be on high protein/low carb diets, and work for JP Morgan. Not everyone can live up to these expectations. But if you can, HMU.
We should start being more realistic about what it is that we want in a significant other and stop living with the mentality that “something better is always around the corner.” I’m not saying “don’t have fun” or “don’t be a slut.” By all means, be a slut. I passionately encourage the sluttiness. How else should you know what you like? I am just saying that we should all be more open to the idea of being with someone that doesn’t fit this unrealistic image of a significant other. No one wants to be a single old QUEEN. I know that I don’t.
All the love,
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