7 Creative Pick Up Lines You Won’t Believe Someone Actually Used

Lindsey Washington
Lindsey Washington aka lindsanity to her friends can either be found roaming the city looking for shade or out with friends throwing shade. She is currently trying to work on her obsession with Lil Wayne and accepting the fact that they will probably never get married, also Drake.

Pick up lines; compliments; things people yell on the street — sometimes they’re all one in the same. As a girl who has lived in Washington, D.C. and New York City — the lands of artists, creators, and poets of all walks of life — I’ve heard some very colorful, creative, and sometimes offensive, lines.

These are some of my favorites.

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“USA! USA! -long pause- United States of Ass!”

Said by: A passerby in the Bronx
The recipient: A dear friend of mine
The location: East Fordham Road
The reason: Well, I guess my friend has a nice ass? I’m not exactly sure but for all you men out there please don’t disguise your pick up lines as some sort of patriotic outburst, it does not work.

 

“Hey girl! You got some sexy nostrils.”

Said by: A young gentleman
The recipient: A dear friend of mine
The location: Outside a 7-Eleven
The reason: My friend had her nose pierced a few months before, and this young gentleman obviously noticed. I will give this one some kudos as it is a long cry from the typical lines you might’ve heard, so he does get an A+ for creativity. However, these two did not ride off into the sunset together, so it’s still a pretty big fail.

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“Well hello there, I happen to be looking for a girlfriend from the Caribbean.”

Said by: A creeper in the Metro
The recipient: Me
The location: The Metro card dispenser on 59th Street
The reason: I guess I look like I’m from the Caribbean? And I guess he was also looking for a girlfriend. Either way, I’m not from the Caribbean. I’m from D.C. and I never appreciate being disturbed while trying to refill my Metro card.

 

“Girl I just saw into the future. I saw you and me together. Now let’s make it happen.”

Said by: A drunken club goer
The recipient: My cousin
The location: A club in D.C.
The reason: I feel like I’ve heard some rendition of this before but it’s a cumbersome pick up line, especially when it’s coming from the mouth of a drunken fool. It’s long, not casual and makes you come off as being super thirsty.

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“Are you a magician? Because when I see you everyone else disappears.”

Said by: A passerby
The recipient: Another cousin of mine
The location: The streets of D.C.
The reason: I can honestly say this is pretty clever. I’ve never heard anything like this before. Despite the creativity, the line did not work and my cousin is still single.

 

“Ooh you like that cereal, too? We must belong together.”

Said by: A fellow shopper
The recipient: You guessed it, another cousin
The location: A Publix in Florida
The reason: My cousin told me: “I was in Publix trying to buy cereal and I went to pick up some Cinnamon Toast Crunch, when this man came up behind me and whispered this in my ear.” Really? I know the basis of a good relationship is to have things in common, but I think we can let this one go.

 

“You’re like my pinky toe. I want to bang you against my coffee table.”

Said by: A Tinder bro
The recipient: My roommate
The location: The World Wide Web
The reason: She deleted Tinder and has since moved on from this unfortunate incident.

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